Truly, you have a dizzying intellect.

Sometimes I think my favorite part about eating apples is ripping the stems off beforehand. I'm not sure who told me this, but a long, long time ago (in a galaxy far, far away . . . just kidding, it was in Ohio) someone told me that you recite the alphabet with each twist of the stem and whatever letter the stem comes off at is the first letter of the last name of the person you're going to marry. Either I am exceptionally strong or the apples I'm eating have really weak stems, but I never can make it past "D." I guess the universe is trying to tell me I'll never marry Jake Gyllenhaal or John Krasinski, but I'm really hoping the universe is wrong.