Monday, January 04, 2010

Day One: Insanity sets in

Oh yawn, you guys. Seriously, YAWN. I am about to get super whiny all over the place, so please bear with me. Actually, no, it's probably not that whiny. I'm too tired to be very whiny. OK, that was whiny. Whiny is starting to sound weird because I've said it so many times. Whiny, whiny, whiny. Anyway.

I was so unhealthy yesterday, so very very unhealthy, food-wise, because yesterday was, as I decided to call it, My Last Hurrah. So, of course, I was going to eat as much junk food as possible. I figured, WHY NOT, since today started the healthy-eating/exercising/grocery-going part of my Year Goals. All the junk food was a mistake, however, because it made my tummy all sorts of hurty. Plus, I'm partially blaming all the junk food for not being able to sleep last night. There were other reasons, though. I mean, I hadn't had to get up for work in like twelve days, so I was worried about not getting enough sleep and being all tired today. That's a vicious cycle, yeah? You're lying there in bed, thinking about how you have to be up in [blank] hours, and the more you worry about not getting enough sleep, the harder it is to FALL asleep and before you know it, it's four in the morning and you wonder if you should just get up because you were planning on getting up at five anyway.

Because, YEAH, I got up at five in the morning today. THAT IS SO EARLY. Phoebe was SUPER excited, because I'd gotten up that early to exercise before work and she loves when I exercise in the living room because she thinks I'm a cat jungle gym. Whenever I do pilates or yoga or whatever, she's all climbing over my prone body and getting smacked by flying limbs and mrorwing at me for not petting her because didn't you know? That's what I'm there for. To pet her and pick up her poops and feed her and get her high on kitty pot.

I know the day is only half over, but I'm counting it as a success as far as my goals go. After all, I got up at five, exercised, have eaten nothing but the healthiest of foods so far, and am planning on going to the grocery after work, then cooking a healthy dinner. Win win win! Yeah, it's only been one day, but whatever, I know I can do it because this one time? (at band camp?) I lost a bajillion (read: 50) pounds and I didn't even exercise, I just ate the tiny amounts of food that Weight Watchers claims are REAL SERVINGS because Weight Watchers is evil. It's true. They're totally in cahoots with The Mayor and Ryan the Temp and Sue Sylvester, I SWEAR.

6 comments:

  1. I'm proud of you for getting up at 5 AM. That is quite an achievement.

    Also, is Ryan the Temp really evil? I think he's just a dick.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I hate Ryan the Temp.

    So far I've consumed half an apple and half a stack of salt and vinegar Pringles. So, it all balances out?

    I can't believe you got up at 5 and exercised! You are badass.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Do you grow the kitty pot at home or do you get it from a guy who knows a dude?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Awesome job for day 1!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Joe, Ryan is eeeevil like the fru-its of the deviiiil.

    mg! I think Pringles are basically flavored cardboard (delicious, delicious cardboard), which I think means they have very few calories.

    Sir, I get it from The Dude.

    Suzy, thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Ok, seriously, why is Ryan the Temp all evil now? I hate him!

    ReplyDelete