I find that sometimes I don't write in here because I feel like I tell you guys the same things over and over. Like, haha, the other day I said something stupid and everyone made fun of me (true)! Or, I spent all of Saturday watching season 2 of Buffy (also true). Or even, JENNIE LOVE DUCKS (truest of all). I'm pretty sure I've even used the title of this post before. And I'm pretty sure I've SAID I'm pretty sure I've used the title of this post before AHHHH OMG meta tornado save the ducklings!
So that's why I don't post sometimes. It's not because I don't love you guys. In fact, it's just the opposite. I love you TOO much, so much that I've pitched a tent on your front lawn and spelled "I LUV U" in a gasoline-fire in the grass and now I'm standing there with my boombox blaring some Peter Gabriel and WHY WON'T YOU COME OUTSIDE AND TALK TO ME. Or at least let me in to use the bathroom.
Now let me tell you about my weekend, in which I said some stupid shit, spent most of my days watching Buffy, and then talked about how much I love ducks. ZING!
But yeah, you know what? I do love ducks. And you know what else? I went for the best run ever yesterday and you want to know why? Hardly anyone was in my park.
Here's what, internet. A week or so after Joe and I moved to the new place, I went for a run to make sure we'd moved to a running-friendly neighborhood. Because where I lived last year? Not so running-friendly, unless I wanted to drive somewhere else to run which seems wrong in some way, don't you think? Anyway, so I decided to go run around this one pond but then I discovered that there was no path around the pond! Which would be fine, if I wanted to run through goose turds but I didn't want to run through goose turds so I just kept going on the sidewalk because I wanted to see where the sidewalk ends (Shel Silverstein FTW!) and you know where it ended? In a park. An awesome park with lots of trees and a nice running path and a community garden (I think?) and geeses and duckses and frogs, oh my! No lie, you guys, I ran around that park with a big, stupid smile on my face and when I got home I was all, "JOE! I FOUND A PARK! And it was awesome! I saw some ducks! And geese! And a frog! Well, I HEARD a frog! Also, guess what?! I saw an albino squirrel! It looked at me!" because I am five, apparently. And also Dug from Up.
So now that is my park. I get very angry whenever I go there and someone else is using it. Effing hell, man, GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE I SICK MY GEESE-GANG ON YOU! You don't want to mess with my geese-gang. Nesting makes them loco.
I don't know where this park came from because it wasn't always there and it looks pretty new and they keep updating it with cool stuff. Like, last night I discovered that they had put in these little information boxes and you could push buttons and some nice lady would tell you all about crayfish and maple trees and stuff. Not like, crayfish IN maple trees because that would be weird. It's an awesome park but it's not a magic park. That I know of. I will keep you all updated.
It is SO a magic park. You're only trying to keep it from us but it won't work.
ReplyDeleteThis was a story worth telling, so thank you! You should always share magic parks with your Internets. But not your neighbors.
ReplyDeleteWhat are these 'park' things you speak of? They sound wonderful.
ReplyDeleteyour park sounds like magic. i want to go.
ReplyDeleteI could also stand to hear more about Buffy Season 2.
ReplyDeletePeefer...what park are you talking about?
ReplyDeleteJulie, I hope your new neighbors are better than your old ones.
Ashley, do you not have parks? What?
kat, it is one of my favorite places EVER.
Kiti, I should have recapped. Hmm, maybe for Season 3.
I live in the desert. There are parks, but . . . they are pretty lame and there aren't many of them because of water conservation and stuff. Grass, ducks, all that stuff . . . there are like three combined in Tucson and Phoenix. Now, snakes and javelinas and cactuses, I've got plenty of those.
ReplyDeleteI'm a'scared of snakes.
ReplyDeleteJennie - Seasons 2 and 3 are my favorite of Buffy. Also! I was out with a guy on Wednesday who drunkenly invited me to spend the weekend with him in Dayton. I was pleased that I'd heard of Dayton. You probably don't know this guy, though. Right? Dayton isn't that small.
ReplyDeleteAshley - Don't forget the scorpions. You have those, too. I actually lived across the street from a nature park in Phoenix (North Mountain) and it was big with hikers but there were definitely no ducks.
It's possible...what's his name? I know everyone! OK, not really, but you never know, he could be my neighbor or something.
ReplyDeleteWell, this guy's name is Jon, but I don't know his last name, and he is from Dayton but is currently living in Alaska. I was actually out with a group, and this guy is a friend of a friend. His friend that I know is Matt Saunders, also from Dayton.
ReplyDelete