I hope I never win the lottery, THANKS A LOT ALANIS

I recently said these words out loud and I was not exaggerating or being ironic or anything but especially I wasn't being ironic because I grew up listening to Alanis Morissette and so I'll never know what ironic means. ANYWAY here is what I said: "My routine is broken...I'll have to start over." Joe was immediately all, "OK, Abed," which...whatever, TRUE.

I took this assessment at work a while ago called the Kolbe (you can take it, too, if you have $50 lying around that you'd rather spend on a test and not on booze or videogames or whatever it is you kids do nowadays) and it told me a lot of stuff I already know SUCH AS:

• I like to make lists and spreadsheets
• I'm super organized but also procrastinate like hell
• I like to plan things
• I like to come up with ideas and new projects but not follow through on them or do any of the work myself (uh-DUH, please see all of my deserted blog projects for evidence)

It wasn't all that enlightening but I do enjoy taking these kinds of tests. I've taken the Myers-Briggs like 25 times over the course of the years and I always get the same thing: INTJ. Here. I'll prove it. I'll take it right now. 

Nah, I didn't really take it. I thought about it, though. And then I watched Paul Rudd dancing gifs instead. It was way better. See?



In other news, last night I had a dream that Jeff Winger got mad at me because, while strolling around Greendale, I told him that I thought Timothy Olyphant was handsomer than him. Because my brain is a place where Jeff Winger The Fictional Character coexists with Timothy Olyphant The Actual Person and is jealous of him. Anyway, Jeff Winger spent the rest of the day alternating between making sad, puppy dog eyes at me and then glaring at me and shouting, "HE IS NOT HANDSOMER." I'm pretty proud of my brain for knowing that that's exactly how Jeff Winger would react. Also, apparently my brain is so sad about the Community hiatus that it's making up its own episodes of Community when I fall asleep and YOU GUYS I'M TOTALLY OK WITH THAT. My brain could be dreaming about anything. Killer pandas. Penguins who can talk. ROBERT DOWNEY JR. The other night I flew around Hogwarts. Not on a broom, but like Peter Pan, only I didn't need magic or fairy dust, which is a shame because if I was going to look for magic and fairy dust, I'd head straight to Hogwarts first. But no, my brain takes me to Greendale way more often than Hogwarts, which means that my brain thinks that Greendale is more magic than A SCHOOL FOR WITCHCRAFT AND WIZARDRY. Well played, brain. Well played.