Thursday, December 20, 2012

this is the way the world ends

The world is supposed to end tomorrow, so I took the day off. If it's my last day on Earth, I don't want to spend it trapped at work. Plus, this week of work has been an absolute waste of time. No one wants to be working. It's like those last few days of school before Christmas break, when all you do is trade cookies and candy and presents and then watch movies for the rest of the day, but it's worse this year because maybe the world is ending? So why bother with anything, right? Joe and I were recently discussing the impending apocalypse BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT WE DO: 

Me: You know, if you and I could still be together afterward, I don't think I'd really mind if the world ended on Friday.
Joe: Me neither.
Me: And I'd want our friends and family to be there, too.
Joe: Well, they probably would be, what with the world ending and all.
Me: Only if we all end up in the same Hell dimension.
Joe: That's true.
Me: I don't really believe in Hell, though.
Joe: No?
Me: No. I'm pretty sure we all just blink out of existence in the end.
Joe: WOW.

I don't really believe that, though. I don't think. I don't know what I believe. I mean, death is so totally weird, right? Like, one minute you're you, in your body, just hanging out like always, the next moment you're just gone? What IS that? Where did you go?

Right after my grandma died, (and I don't remember how this came up) I found out that some people believe that when you go to Heaven, you don't ever see anyone you knew when you were alive. And I was already depressed but that knocked the wind out of me. Why would anyone want to believe something like that? It's so depressing. I have a problem accepting any idea about the afterlife, really, because no one knows for sure. But I have some ideas, I guess? Though, they're less ideas and more, just, what I WANT the afterlife to be like. But first let's start with what I don't want:

1. I don't want to get to Heaven and have it be full of strangers, like some awful party where I don't know anyone and I'm forced to make awkward small talk until the end of eternity (which I think never ends, maybe?) but then again, if I end up in a place like that, it's probably not Heaven.
2. I'd like to not just blink out of existence. I've grown quite fond of existing, so I'd like to continue to do so in some way.
3. I don't mind the idea of reincarnation, though I'd prefer not to be reincarnated as a dung beetle or a Tea Partier or something.

Here is what would be nice:

1. That I get to hang out with all the people (and pets!) I've known in my life who've died.
2. That I get to hang out with all the other people in my life, but only ones I like.
3. That I can fly.

dancing doctors

That's really all I need. I do like the idea of Heaven that's presented in that movie Defending Your Life. Except for the whole "being on trial" thing. And the possibility that you'd miss out on going to Heaven and have to go back to stinky Earth-life.

So anyway, see you all in Heaven on Saturday (FINGERS CROSSED)! I'll bring the tequila because NO HANGOVERS IN THE AFTERLIFE THAT'S WHY.


  1. Why does everybody keep talking about the apocalypse :(

    My boss made me feel better today when he told me that it's already 12/21 in Australia. I'm not sure why that's comforting, but it is.

  2. That's true, if Australia is still here, we're probably safe. Or The Doctor saved us AGAIN.

  3. I love you. That is all.

  4. Anonymous2:45 PM

    Right here is the right blog for everyone who hopes to find out about this topic.
    You realize a whole lot its almost tough to argue with you
    (not that I really would want to…HaHa). You definitely put a brand
    new spin on a topic that has been written about for decades.
    Wonderful stuff, just great!
    Here is my weblog ...

  5. Anonymous5:36 PM

    Hi! Someone in my Facebook group shared this website with us so I came
    to check it out. I'm definitely enjoying the information. I'm book-marking and will be tweeting this to my followers!
    Superb blog and wonderful design.
    Review my blog post ... FastPaydayLoan

  6. Anonymous7:42 PM

    Hello there! This post couldn't be written any better! Reading this post reminds me of my old room mate! He always kept talking about this. I will forward this write-up to him. Fairly certain he will have a good read. Thank you for sharing!
    Here is my web-site - Quick Loans 560

  7. Anonymous11:04 PM

    It's really very difficult in this full of activity life to listen news on TV, so I just use web for that reason, and get the newest news.
    My homepage ; Fast Cash Loan

  8. Anonymous12:40 AM

    Woah! I'm really loving the template/theme of this website. It's simple, yet effective.
    A lot of times it's tough to get that "perfect balance" between user friendliness and visual appeal. I must say you have done a superb job with this. Additionally, the blog loads extremely fast for me on Opera. Excellent Blog!
    My homepage

  9. Anonymous2:01 AM

    Just desire to say your article is as astounding.

    The clearness in your post is just nice and i could assume you're an expert on this subject. Fine with your permission allow me to grab your feed to keep up to date with forthcoming post. Thanks a million and please keep up the gratifying work.
    my website ::

  10. Anonymous6:12 AM

    My brother recommended I might like this website. He was totally right.
    This post truly made my day. You cann't imagine simply how much time I had spent for this information! Thanks!
    My blog post ...

  11. Anonymous6:17 AM

    I am extremely impressed with your writing skills and also with the layout
    on your weblog. Is this a paid theme or did you customize it yourself?
    Either way keep up the excellent quality writing, it is rare to
    see a nice blog like this one today.
    Here is my website :: instantloan960

  12. Anonymous7:48 AM

    Your way of explaining all in this post is in fact nice, every one be
    capable of simply be aware of it, Thanks a lot.
    Feel free to visit my website -

  13. Anonymous8:17 AM

    It is in point of fact a nice and helpful piece of information.

    I'm happy that you shared this useful info with us. Please stay us informed like this. Thanks for sharing.
    My webpage :

  14. The anonymous comments here are the best anonymous comments ever, probably.

  15. Holy shit. I didn't even realize this post had so many anon comments. Yikes.