I don't know what it is but lately all I want to do is NOTHING. Like, literally nothing. I could sit and stare into space and...that would be fine, I guess? But instead I've been sitting and staring at the computer or the TV, which is almost like staring into space but space is bigger because it's full of...well, space.
This weekend I barely did anything BUT watch TV. And terrible TV! I'm sort of embarrassed about how many episodes of Grey's Anatomy I watched this weekend (and not just because YOU GUYS IT'S SO TERRIBLE) but mostly I can't even remember how many I watched THAT'S HOW MANY THERE WERE. I don't care, though, because I forgot how easy it is to get wrapped up in the goings on of Seattle Grace even though it's COMPLETELY NUTS and they are all terrible doctors.
Anyway. I hope this urge to do nothing goes away soon because I was doing SO, SO WELL with the whole writing every day thing, and I was eating better and cooking more and exercising...um...sometimes and reading ALL THE TIME but now I can't even get into any books*. Until that happens, though, I guess I'll just be sitting here, doing nothing, and blaming it on the following factors:
1. The weather
It's not even that it's cold, it's that it's GREY ALL THE TIME. What's the sun look like? What's a sun? WHAT IS WARMTH AND HAPPINESS?
2. The time of year
The holiday season, it is upon us, but if it could get offon us anytime soon, that'd be awesome. There are too many plans and too many moneys to spend and not enough free time. BAH HUMBUG.
3. Eating terribly
Seriously, self, stop eating all the junk food. Leave some for everyone else.
4. Not exercising
I really like going for hikes/walks/whatnot but it's dark when I leave for work (basically) and dark when I get home and I don't want to get lost/kidnapped/abducted by aliens. Unless the alien is a specific Time Lord.
5. TV is too awesome
This morning I told Joe that we should get rid of cable and Netflix, because we'd get so much more done. He pointed out that we'd still have the internet because HE IS UNHELPFUL.
*that's kind of a lie because last night I started reading a book I really didn't want to put down but my brain apparently needs to sleep or something...stupid brain
Showing posts with label holidays. Show all posts
Showing posts with label holidays. Show all posts
Monday, December 10, 2012
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
Joey had reasons. They were threefold.
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, which is my favorite holiday, YES EVEN MORE
FAVORITE THAN CHRISTMAS. Thanksgiving is an excuse for sloth and
gluttony, which are two of my favorite vices, and, yeah, you can eat a
lot and sleep a lot on Christmas but there's so much PRESSURE at
Christmastime. You have to buy the right gifts and make sure you spend
time with all of your friends and family, and there's usually some
work-related holiday function you have to attend and when, WHEN I ASK YOU, is the
free time at Christmas? There's no such thing.
Not Thanksgiving, though. Sure, you might have to make several stops on your Thanksgiving journey, but there's delicious food at all of them. It's what the Pilgrims always dreamed of. I think. Right? Wasn't that was the point of the first Thanksgiving? Eating and drinking a lot? And being really smelly?
And so, in honor of America's laziest holiday, I present...A LIST. My top five Thanksgivings, in no particular order:
1. The Shrinking Table
Back when I was in high school, I think, we went to Thanksgiving at my Grandma's, because TRADITION. My cousins were all very wee and I spent most of my time chasing them around my Grandma's house until one or all of us got tired. In a brief moment of rest, I was sitting at a large folding table with my dad when my cousin Josh, then four or so, came in. He walked out of the room, and I don't know how this came about, but my dad and I decided to fold up the table we were sitting at and set up a slightly smaller one. When Josh came back in, he was amazed! The table had shrunk! What sorcery was this?!
He left again, we folded up that table, and replaced it with a slightly smaller one. Josh came back in and was all, "wtf," but, you know, in four-year-old-speak, and I told him Casper had come in and was sprinkling shrinking powder on everything. Which maybe traumatized him for life but we're not sure yet. Josh left again, we replaced that table with a TV tray, Josh came in and saw it, left to look for Casper, and when he came back in, we'd put the TV tray away and told Josh that the table finally got so small that we couldn't see it anymore. It was awesome.
Also, I just remembered that this might have also happened on Christmas, not Thanksgiving. THIS LIST IS RUINED ALREADY.
2. The First Thanksgiving (with Joe)
I'm not talking about actual Thanksgiving, when our schedule was thus: I went to my family's Thanksgiving, he went to his family's, I went over to his family's for dessert, we both went back to MY family's for dessert...I mean, wtf, that is crazy, which is why now we alternate Thanksgiving holidays with our families. Last year, we spent Thanksgiving with my family, this year we spend it with his family, and so on and so on forever and ever.
I'm talking about the next day, when we consolidated all of the Thanksgiving leftovers our parents had given us, with a trip to the grocery store for extra mashed potatoes (probably), and rewarmed everything so we could eat another Thanksgiving dinner, in our pajamas, while watching It's Always Sunny or some other such nonsense. Perfect day, yes?
3. The Turkey Trot
Back in 2007, Heidi and I decided that the best way to start our Thanksgiving would obviously be to run five miles, because then there would be zero guilt about the 50 pounds of mashed potatoes we planned on eating later in the day. We "trained" for it and were at the starting line at 8am that frigid, rainy morning and, though we felt like dying several times during the race, we finished it. I wanted to wear my number for the rest of the day but eventually showered so I could spend Thanksgiving with my family, drinking wine and playing games and talking about my upcoming trip to DC because that was also the same year as:
4. Collective Thanksgiving!
This was not the first time I'd ever met anyone IRL after getting to know them online, and it wasn't the last time, but it was the most memorable. I don't even remember how exactly The Collective as a group came to be. Kat and I had been reading each other's blogs for quite a while, and I vaguely remember somehow stumbling across Heather Anne and Abigail's blogs, but I don't remember when we all stopped being Heather Anne and Kat and Abigail and Jennie and instead became a complete set.
I also can't remember whose idea it was to get together for Thanksgiving, but that person is a genius. I got up in the wee small hours of the morning on Black Friday, but it wasn't to go shopping, it was to drive to DC and meet some of the best people I've ever had the honor of knowing. There was something magical about that trip. We got to skip the "getting to know you" portion of IRL friendships because we already knew each other. We knew each other for years without ever having met. But, you know, I'm so glad we finally did meet, obviously. I mean, otherwise I would have missed Abigail and Heather Anne's version of the OK Go treadmill dance, and who other than Kat would ever make me a balloon animal and then tie it to a firecracker? THEY ARE THE GREETEST.
5. The One With Chandler in a Box
Yeah, I know I wasn't technically AT this Thanksgiving celebration but I watched it on TV and isn't that almost the same thing? YES.
Not Thanksgiving, though. Sure, you might have to make several stops on your Thanksgiving journey, but there's delicious food at all of them. It's what the Pilgrims always dreamed of. I think. Right? Wasn't that was the point of the first Thanksgiving? Eating and drinking a lot? And being really smelly?
And so, in honor of America's laziest holiday, I present...A LIST. My top five Thanksgivings, in no particular order:
1. The Shrinking Table
Back when I was in high school, I think, we went to Thanksgiving at my Grandma's, because TRADITION. My cousins were all very wee and I spent most of my time chasing them around my Grandma's house until one or all of us got tired. In a brief moment of rest, I was sitting at a large folding table with my dad when my cousin Josh, then four or so, came in. He walked out of the room, and I don't know how this came about, but my dad and I decided to fold up the table we were sitting at and set up a slightly smaller one. When Josh came back in, he was amazed! The table had shrunk! What sorcery was this?!
He left again, we folded up that table, and replaced it with a slightly smaller one. Josh came back in and was all, "wtf," but, you know, in four-year-old-speak, and I told him Casper had come in and was sprinkling shrinking powder on everything. Which maybe traumatized him for life but we're not sure yet. Josh left again, we replaced that table with a TV tray, Josh came in and saw it, left to look for Casper, and when he came back in, we'd put the TV tray away and told Josh that the table finally got so small that we couldn't see it anymore. It was awesome.
Also, I just remembered that this might have also happened on Christmas, not Thanksgiving. THIS LIST IS RUINED ALREADY.
2. The First Thanksgiving (with Joe)
I'm not talking about actual Thanksgiving, when our schedule was thus: I went to my family's Thanksgiving, he went to his family's, I went over to his family's for dessert, we both went back to MY family's for dessert...I mean, wtf, that is crazy, which is why now we alternate Thanksgiving holidays with our families. Last year, we spent Thanksgiving with my family, this year we spend it with his family, and so on and so on forever and ever.
I'm talking about the next day, when we consolidated all of the Thanksgiving leftovers our parents had given us, with a trip to the grocery store for extra mashed potatoes (probably), and rewarmed everything so we could eat another Thanksgiving dinner, in our pajamas, while watching It's Always Sunny or some other such nonsense. Perfect day, yes?
3. The Turkey Trot
Back in 2007, Heidi and I decided that the best way to start our Thanksgiving would obviously be to run five miles, because then there would be zero guilt about the 50 pounds of mashed potatoes we planned on eating later in the day. We "trained" for it and were at the starting line at 8am that frigid, rainy morning and, though we felt like dying several times during the race, we finished it. I wanted to wear my number for the rest of the day but eventually showered so I could spend Thanksgiving with my family, drinking wine and playing games and talking about my upcoming trip to DC because that was also the same year as:
4. Collective Thanksgiving!
This was not the first time I'd ever met anyone IRL after getting to know them online, and it wasn't the last time, but it was the most memorable. I don't even remember how exactly The Collective as a group came to be. Kat and I had been reading each other's blogs for quite a while, and I vaguely remember somehow stumbling across Heather Anne and Abigail's blogs, but I don't remember when we all stopped being Heather Anne and Kat and Abigail and Jennie and instead became a complete set.
I also can't remember whose idea it was to get together for Thanksgiving, but that person is a genius. I got up in the wee small hours of the morning on Black Friday, but it wasn't to go shopping, it was to drive to DC and meet some of the best people I've ever had the honor of knowing. There was something magical about that trip. We got to skip the "getting to know you" portion of IRL friendships because we already knew each other. We knew each other for years without ever having met. But, you know, I'm so glad we finally did meet, obviously. I mean, otherwise I would have missed Abigail and Heather Anne's version of the OK Go treadmill dance, and who other than Kat would ever make me a balloon animal and then tie it to a firecracker? THEY ARE THE GREETEST.
5. The One With Chandler in a Box
Yeah, I know I wasn't technically AT this Thanksgiving celebration but I watched it on TV and isn't that almost the same thing? YES.
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
Some people wait a lifetime...
Halloweentime is almost over and it's finally sinking in that, once again, I hardly took advantage of it. I mean, I watched a couple of horror movies but nowhere NEAR the number I wanted to. For those interested, I watched: Cabin in the Woods, Village of the Damned, and Slither. THREE MOVIES. THAT'S IT? Who am I?
I feel like this always happens around holidays, especially Halloween and Christmas. I really MEAN to celebrate them but I never feel like I celebrated them as well as I could have. And WHO CARES. No one. No one cares that I forgot to listen to Christmas carols until the day before Christmas or that I didn't carve a pumpkin or that I didn't dress up AT ALL.
OK, I care about that last one. Luckily, even though I was sick for the Halloween party we were invited to, I was able to dress up for work today. Sure, I'm dressed in a costume I've worn twice before but it's the best costume I've ever worn so I feel no shame. Why shouldn't I get as much mileage out of it as possible?
Anyway, so that's why I'm dressed as Velma today. AT WORK. This is my favorite costume ever and I'll tell you why:
1. I can utilize the glasses I already wear as part of my costume.
2. I already have similar hair to Velma, so I don't have to wear a wig or really do anything different to it.
3. The costume is basically regular clothes, so I'm pretty comfortable.
All of these reasons revolve around my ever-present laziness. I'm too lazy to put in contacts in the morning, I'm too lazy to do anything crazy to my hair, and I'm too lazy to really MAKE a costume, so I just wear normal clothes. This is my idea of a perfect Halloween! Which is why, in the past, I've dressed up as the following:
1. Kelly Clarkson (this mostly consisted of me walking around all night screaming, "FOR A MOMENT LIKE THIS!")
2. Lucy van Pelt
3. Adam Sandler
4. Um, that's all I remember.
I feel like my costumes were more elaborate when I was a child. One year, my mom made me this awesome playing card costume. I think I was the Ace of Spades or something. I don't remember. But it was so great! Only I couldn't sit down all night, so that was kind of a problem only not really because who ever sits down when they're a kid? Especially when they're trick-or-treating?
Speaking of, can we institute some kind of adult trick-or-treating? Like, I don't have kids, but I still want free candy, so can I take Max out trick-or-treating or something? I mean, HE ALREADY HAS A COSTUME.
I feel like this always happens around holidays, especially Halloween and Christmas. I really MEAN to celebrate them but I never feel like I celebrated them as well as I could have. And WHO CARES. No one. No one cares that I forgot to listen to Christmas carols until the day before Christmas or that I didn't carve a pumpkin or that I didn't dress up AT ALL.
OK, I care about that last one. Luckily, even though I was sick for the Halloween party we were invited to, I was able to dress up for work today. Sure, I'm dressed in a costume I've worn twice before but it's the best costume I've ever worn so I feel no shame. Why shouldn't I get as much mileage out of it as possible?
Anyway, so that's why I'm dressed as Velma today. AT WORK. This is my favorite costume ever and I'll tell you why:
1. I can utilize the glasses I already wear as part of my costume.
2. I already have similar hair to Velma, so I don't have to wear a wig or really do anything different to it.
3. The costume is basically regular clothes, so I'm pretty comfortable.
All of these reasons revolve around my ever-present laziness. I'm too lazy to put in contacts in the morning, I'm too lazy to do anything crazy to my hair, and I'm too lazy to really MAKE a costume, so I just wear normal clothes. This is my idea of a perfect Halloween! Which is why, in the past, I've dressed up as the following:
1. Kelly Clarkson (this mostly consisted of me walking around all night screaming, "FOR A MOMENT LIKE THIS!")
2. Lucy van Pelt
3. Adam Sandler
4. Um, that's all I remember.
I feel like my costumes were more elaborate when I was a child. One year, my mom made me this awesome playing card costume. I think I was the Ace of Spades or something. I don't remember. But it was so great! Only I couldn't sit down all night, so that was kind of a problem only not really because who ever sits down when they're a kid? Especially when they're trick-or-treating?
Speaking of, can we institute some kind of adult trick-or-treating? Like, I don't have kids, but I still want free candy, so can I take Max out trick-or-treating or something? I mean, HE ALREADY HAS A COSTUME.
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| Wiener on wiener action |
Thursday, March 17, 2011
you pinch me, I choke you
I'm not wearing green today. In fact, I'm wearing red. It's not that I don't like St. Patrick's Day, it's just FUCK YOU DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO WEAR. Also, I always look for excuses to get mad at people, so if anyone tries to pinch me I WILL CHOKE THEM. Of course, choking a coworker might get me fired, but according to this study, that might be a good thing. But seriously, coworkers, DO NOT TOUCH ME. Or, like, even talk to me.
I have the day off tomorrow and I was talking to Joe last night about how, just a few years ago, I would have been so excited that I could celebrate St. Patrick's Day without having to work the next day. Hell, even if I DID have to work the next day, I probably would have celebrated. I think it was three years ago that Steve, Heidi, and I got my dad (my dad: "Does this make me an enabler?) to drop us off at Harrigan's on St. Patrick's Day in the middle of the week. We had my dad drop us off because A) we assumed the parking lot would be full and B) we all had to work the next day, so we needed our cars, like, at home. It was brilliant, right? We'd just take a taxi home!
We did not take into account that everyone in Dayton would be taking taxis home, and so when we called for one, there were none available. Like, as in, they told us they might be able to pick us up...at 5 AM. At that point, it was too late to call anyone to pick us up because, duh, they all had to work the next day, too, so we walked. It was only like two and a half miles, so it wasn't THAT crazy, except that Steve had recently had knee surgery and still had a brace, I think? And some weird guys kept trying to convince us to come to their apartment? We were all really hungry, too, because beer needs feeding after a while, and I was getting bored because walking was taking too long, so I ran the last mile ahead of Heidi and Steve, I guess to make food? And to get home faster. Sure.
Heidi and Steve got home to find the front door open and me running around the apartment brushing my teeth. I had also dumped a box of granola bars on top of the stove for them. That was me cooking, I guess? Probably safer than me actually using the oven in that state, so they should be happy they didn't come home to find the apartment on fire.
Anyway, Happy St. Patrick's Day!
I have the day off tomorrow and I was talking to Joe last night about how, just a few years ago, I would have been so excited that I could celebrate St. Patrick's Day without having to work the next day. Hell, even if I DID have to work the next day, I probably would have celebrated. I think it was three years ago that Steve, Heidi, and I got my dad (my dad: "Does this make me an enabler?) to drop us off at Harrigan's on St. Patrick's Day in the middle of the week. We had my dad drop us off because A) we assumed the parking lot would be full and B) we all had to work the next day, so we needed our cars, like, at home. It was brilliant, right? We'd just take a taxi home!
We did not take into account that everyone in Dayton would be taking taxis home, and so when we called for one, there were none available. Like, as in, they told us they might be able to pick us up...at 5 AM. At that point, it was too late to call anyone to pick us up because, duh, they all had to work the next day, too, so we walked. It was only like two and a half miles, so it wasn't THAT crazy, except that Steve had recently had knee surgery and still had a brace, I think? And some weird guys kept trying to convince us to come to their apartment? We were all really hungry, too, because beer needs feeding after a while, and I was getting bored because walking was taking too long, so I ran the last mile ahead of Heidi and Steve, I guess to make food? And to get home faster. Sure.
Heidi and Steve got home to find the front door open and me running around the apartment brushing my teeth. I had also dumped a box of granola bars on top of the stove for them. That was me cooking, I guess? Probably safer than me actually using the oven in that state, so they should be happy they didn't come home to find the apartment on fire.
Anyway, Happy St. Patrick's Day!
Friday, November 28, 2008
Custard, good. Jam, good. Meat, GOOD!
Yawn. I'm at work and I'm wicked bored. So wicked bored that I've decided to pretend I'm from Boston. No. That's not true at all. I'm sorry for lying, but I'm bored, so what else do you expect me to do? I think even my boss is bored. She popped into my office earlier to tell me about some documentary she watched last night (that I totally want to see now) about how long it will take, once the humans are dead, for all evidence of humanity to disappear. Like roads and buildings and stuff. I tried to tell her that WALL-E will stick around and clean the place up, but she didn't know what I was talking about. While she was talking, I kept thinking, "Oh, shit, Jennie, pay attention, maybe this has something to do with a project she wants you to work on," and then I realized that I don't, in fact, have anything to do with cleaning up after humanity (that's Kat's job), and that my boss was just bored and wanted to tell me about a wicked cool (yeah, I need to stop that) TV show she'd watched.
Then she left. And five minutes later she came back to tell me about this OTHER thing she'd seen at the Smithsonian about how, if all of time was 24 hours or something, humans have only been around for a minute. Only she used more words and it sounded better than what I just said. Then we talked about how thinking about that kind of thing makes us feel tiny and insignificant and I was all, "Kind of makes you wonder why we have to go to work every day," because I was hoping she'd say, "You're right, Jennie. You go home. Watch some TV. Read some books. Take some naps. Enjoy your day." That didn't happen, though.
So, that is why I'm still at work. Although, I have to say I'd rather be at work than out shopping. That's where Heidi is. She went with her mom at 5 AM and they are sure to find billions of deals, but Black Friday scares me. Plus, you can find a lot of deals online, so if you want to spend some money without the bother of talking to people, just head on over to Amazon. Earlier Joe went to Toys (backwards) R Us to look for Guitar Hero guitars and I got the following text messages about his quest:
The line just to get into electronics is sooooooo long.
They sold out! Cries.
Disappointment.
Wait! Wait! They have them!
I have two in my hands.
I'm hoping the "two" he's talking about are guitars and he's not having to perform sexual favors for video games. Actually, no, I don't care either way, as long as we get to play Guitar Hero later. Hee.
I'm actually fighting the urge to take advantage of the SUPER DUPER deals on Threadless and Amazon. I'm mostly done with Christmas shopping, so I'd just be buying stuff for myself but I made a rule that I'm not allowed to buy myself anything until after Christmas. I made this rule last week when I saw Threadless was having a $5 shirt sale and I was all, "OH MY GOD MUST BUY ALL SHIRTS BLAAARG!" Once I calmed down I realized that this is the time of year for buying gifts for OTHERS, not myself, and that Threadless will have another sale in a couple months and I can buy myself all the shirts I want, provided I still have money/a job. Fingers crossed!
Then she left. And five minutes later she came back to tell me about this OTHER thing she'd seen at the Smithsonian about how, if all of time was 24 hours or something, humans have only been around for a minute. Only she used more words and it sounded better than what I just said. Then we talked about how thinking about that kind of thing makes us feel tiny and insignificant and I was all, "Kind of makes you wonder why we have to go to work every day," because I was hoping she'd say, "You're right, Jennie. You go home. Watch some TV. Read some books. Take some naps. Enjoy your day." That didn't happen, though.
So, that is why I'm still at work. Although, I have to say I'd rather be at work than out shopping. That's where Heidi is. She went with her mom at 5 AM and they are sure to find billions of deals, but Black Friday scares me. Plus, you can find a lot of deals online, so if you want to spend some money without the bother of talking to people, just head on over to Amazon. Earlier Joe went to Toys (backwards) R Us to look for Guitar Hero guitars and I got the following text messages about his quest:
The line just to get into electronics is sooooooo long.
They sold out! Cries.
Disappointment.
Wait! Wait! They have them!
I have two in my hands.
I'm hoping the "two" he's talking about are guitars and he's not having to perform sexual favors for video games. Actually, no, I don't care either way, as long as we get to play Guitar Hero later. Hee.
I'm actually fighting the urge to take advantage of the SUPER DUPER deals on Threadless and Amazon. I'm mostly done with Christmas shopping, so I'd just be buying stuff for myself but I made a rule that I'm not allowed to buy myself anything until after Christmas. I made this rule last week when I saw Threadless was having a $5 shirt sale and I was all, "OH MY GOD MUST BUY ALL SHIRTS BLAAARG!" Once I calmed down I realized that this is the time of year for buying gifts for OTHERS, not myself, and that Threadless will have another sale in a couple months and I can buy myself all the shirts I want, provided I still have money/a job. Fingers crossed!
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