I got nothing

This one time? I went to daycare? And one day after school? I got in trouble and had to sit in Time Out? And it was because I said "pubic hair?" But I only said it cause I wanted people to laugh? Because I think if people laugh at me, that means they like me? So I said "pubic hair" and everybody laughed? But the teacher heard me? So I had to sit in Time Out? And it was soooooo funny.

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Today on The Collective, I tell you why you should like Ohio if you want your nut to remain UNKICKED.

the force is strong with that one

The other day, Heidi and I were at Bob Evans (Down on the faaaarm . . . not really, although I HAVE been to the official Bob Evans Farm. Remind me to tell that story sometime.) Anyway. There was a family sitting behind us with a couple kids. I don't know, like 4 or 5. When they got up to leave, the littlest one (maybe 6 years old?) realized he was missing something. Not sure what. But it brought on this conversation:

Little Boy: It doesn't matter, I'll just get more from the bar.
Older Boy: You don't go to the bar any more.
Little Boy: Yeah, I do.
Older Boy: When?
Little Boy: After school.

I think it was really big of Heidi and I to hold our laughter in until the family was out of earshot. You have no idea how hard it was. That's what she said. Sorry.