Thursday, October 02, 2008

Bears. Beets. Battlestar Galactica.

Yesterday, when I got home from work, I saw that the apartment complex people had put a notice on our door. "Oh, no," I thought. "I hope they haven't seen my pet penguin." Just kidding. I don't have a pet penguin, although, I'm pretty sure that since they don't allow dogs, I wouldn't be allowed to keep one in the makeshift ice cooler habitat I'd make out of the storage unit. Anyway.

The notice was to tell us that a coyote had been spotted in the vicinity. A COYOTE. And not the friendly kind that tries to blow you up with dynamite. But a real coyote that will eat your cats and your babies and MAYBE NOT EVEN IN THAT ORDER. Do coyotes eat babies? Or is that just dingoes? Anyway.

Unfortunately, the notice didn't tell you what to do in case you ran into this wily coyote (see what I did there?) during your early morning run or, let's be honest, sleepy walk to your car. I thought back on all of my wild animal knowledge and all I could think of was Dwight's advice about bear attacks, which I didn't think would be very helpful. I thought maybe you beat sticks at it, but then I remembered that that was from The Parent Trap and I think that was to ward off mountain lions, not coyotes. OH MY GOD LOOK AT THIS. AWESOME. My favorite part is the laughing. Anyway.

Heidi actually SAW the coyote with her very own eyes and she said the coyote just looked at her like she was a delicious, delicious baby that it wanted to eat with a side of cranberry sauce. I might have embellished a bit. I told her to stay far away from it if she saw it again, because what if it was friends with the baby raccoons?


  1. This is just like the time there was a wildcat loose on campus. But not, because it wasn't where I live. But cranberry sauce sounds pretty good.

  2. Anonymous1:01 AM

    yeh, well, so did abigail. Sorta looked like someone trying to fall into a Road Runner cartoon or something....

    We had to use Google to convince her that it was a REAL coyote!

    Momma Sal

  3. Seriously... coyotes are little tiny creatures, not fierce ones. We have packs of them living in the hills behind our house. You almost never see them because they are wise enough to be nervous of humans. They yip in the evenings and it makes our cat's hair bush out all over and she kinda growls if you're holding her. Cool.

  4. Dont you still have that pet cicada? Jeff? I hear coyotes run from cicadas.

  5. Jeff has disappeared. Sigh. Cicadas are so fickle.

  6. Abigail11:25 AM

    That parent trap video is the best thing I have ever seen.

  7. What Abigail said.

    That totally cleaned the c-span house vote crud out of my brain. Thanks.