So it would seem I forgot I had a blog. Oops. I was going to write, I really was, but all I had to talk about was coughing and phlegm and Vicks Vapor Rub and nobody wants to hear about that. I'm feeling a bit better today, though, and by that I mean I'm not staring daggers at the clock, wishing for time to go faster so I can go home and put my pajamas on and sit in a drug-induced vegetative state in front of the television. Also, it's Friday. And payday. I enjoy both of those, even though I'm doing this thing where I pretend most of the money in my checking account is not there. I can't spend it if it's not there. This is my reasoning.
I think the drugs are starting to affect my dreams, because last night I dreamt I was at the Inauguration, only it was in this really small concert venue and Barack Obama was wearing the whole graduation get-up (cap and gown and tassels and sashes), which I suppose makes a bit of sense because he was graduating from being awesome to being super awesome. So I'm watching the ceremony and then Barack Obama started singing. I don't remember what song it was but I do remember thinking he had a lovely singing voice. I was way in the back and couldn't see much, so I started inching closer and closer because I'm stealthy like that (until I trip over something or fall over) and soon I was standing right behind the good seats, where all the famous people were sitting. I was standing behind Brian Williams and when he saw me, he jumped up and told me to follow him and I was all, "Sure, Brian Williams, I like your tie, let's go." So then he was all, "Do you know how to drive a taxi?" and I was like, "If a taxi is anything like A CAR, then yes, I can drive a taxi," and he was all, "Thanks, SMART ASS," and I was like, "Chill OUT, Brian Williams, it's a good day!" Then he gave me a taxi and it looked like one of those old, run-down taxis from The Royal Tenenbaums and I drove around for a long time the streets were empty on account of everyone was either AT the Inauguration or WATCHING the Inauguration. Except for me and Brian Williams, of course. Then I woke up and was pissed because I didn't get to see Obama's big encore. The end!