Monday, May 31, 2004

Antie Em, Auntie Em! It's a twister!

Poltergeist is on right now. That movie freaks me the hell out. Especially that part where he peels his face off . . . even though it looks totally fake compared to special effects today.

Last night was so weird. There were storms everywhere, and the possibility of a tornado, but really all that happened was that it rained a lot and there was some really cool lightning. As usual, my dad and I stood out on the back porch like morons watching the storm for a while, while my mom and sister camped out in the basement.

We were watching the news for the weather, and I can't remember if it was channel 2 or 7, but one of them had the dorkiest meteorologist ever. He kept telling people that if they needed to call someone, to use a cell phone, and every time he said cell phone he held his hand up to his ear in the universal gesture of "call me." He also kept saying that people should go into their basement and, if possible, find a bike helmet to wear. That cracked me up, because I kept picturing an entire family crouched in their basement, all wearing some kind of helmet (bike, football, hockey). It reminded me of this time my dad and I were camping for Indian Princesses (yes, I was an indian princess . . . it was better than girl scouts) at Camp Camblegard and a tornado went right over the campgrounds but never touched down. The other tribe (yeah, I'm starting to see why the whole Indian Guide/Princess thing was decided to be a bit too politically incorrect, and now it's called Prairie kids or something like that. Again, with the parentheses, I really apologize . . . I don't know what my deal is with using them all the time now, but let's hope it passes. I think I'll just end this thought right now because I've even managed to confuse myself and I've forgotten what my point was (if I had one, ooh, look, double parentheses)).

Anyway. The other tribe (we were sharing a cabin with them, it was like a double cabin, but connected, shit, I'm doing it again) was camped out in the bathroom, all huddled together and they'd put mattresses up around them. Everyone in our tribe was just chilling on the bunk beds.

I mean, I think there's such a thing as being too cautious. If a tornado comes along and sucks the roof off of the cabin, I don't think a mattress (or a bike helmet) is going to make that much of a difference.

Although, my view of tornadoes is somewhat skewed because, as a child, one of my favorite movies was The Wizard of Oz, and for the longest time I thought getting sucked up in a tornado was just how a person got to the land of munchkins.

Don't worry, I don't believe that anymore.

Not completely, anyway.


  1. Hey! I was an Indian Princess too! Just call me 'Bright Sunrise'! Wow, so politically incorrect it's nuts. I'm sorry to say I have no tornado stories. We were out in the deserts of California. I guess we could have been over cautious about earthquakes! Log cabins, no! Structurally sound concrete shelters, yes!

  2. That made me think of "Benny & Joon," how she always has to wear a helmet before she goes on a car ride. Then I started thinking of Johnny Depp in his little Charlie Chaplin hat, and doing the little biscuit dance in the diner.

    Well, damnit, now I'm thinking about Johnny Depp and certainly won't be writing this paper of mine any time soon. Mmmm Johnny Depp.

  3. Haha, I was thinking the same thing about the helmet thing. When the meterologist said it on channel 7 he kept covering his head with the papers when he said it. I was like can you imagine the tool bags in trailer parks hiding in ditches wearing bicycle helmets?!?!?! or even the people in the miami valley sitting in basements wearing helmets. WTF?!?!! Really, if I get sucked up in a tornado, I don't wanna go out wearing a goofy helmet!