Inspired by both Phil and Tamara, and abnormally full of excess energy, I decided to go for a run tonight. I made two mistakes. First, I waited until it was dark and freezing. Second, I went after dinner instead of before. Stupid, rookie mistake. Dinner tonight was tomato soup, a dish that always makes me feel kind of vomity after eating it anyway and running just made it much, much worse. Why do I eat tomato soup if it makes me feel vomity? I don't know. I like to dip my grilled cheese sandwich in it. Also, it was in the cupboard and it was one of those flip top lids so I didn't even have to use the can opener. This is why I need to start running. I'm too lazy to use a can opener.
I need to find a better place to run, because it takes me about 10 minutes to walk all the way around my apartment complex and I need some variety. Also, I almost ran over some old lady who was walking her dog. It was one of those little ankle biters, and I honestly was scared for my life. Little dogs are so much meaner than big dogs. I have a theory that, because all creatures are inherently a little bit evil (stay with me), when said creature is small there is less room for the evil to spread out so the evil is more concentrated. Was Hitler short? That would explain a lot. As you can probably tell, this theory is not fully developed because I just came up with it.
ANYWAY. I also need to find a better (read: smarter) time to run. It's probably not the best idea to run around a parking lot in the dark. Also, I'm afraid to run at night wearing my MP3 player because someone might pull their car up, stun gun me, and throw me in the trunk and I wouldn't notice because I'd be listening to Spice Girls or something. I don't know why I said Spice Girls. I hate the Spice Girls. I don't even have any Spice Girls music. I don't know why I'm still talking about the Spice Girls, but how embarrassing would that be to get kidnapped while listening to a Spice Girls CD. Like, what if you were thrown in the van and your Discman fell on the ground and when the police got there they'd be all like, "haha, this girl listens to the Spice Girls, let's find her so we can make fun of her!" Although, if you'd just been kidnapped that would probably be the least of your worries.
I think I have too much oxygen in my brain right now. Or I'm just not used to the endorphins or something and that's why I'm all cracked out. My throat hurts from running outside in the (FREEZING) cold. It's not even that cold yet and I'm already whining, so this should be a fun winter. Who wants to go somewhere warm for the next couple of months? We don't have to tell our jobs, we can just pretend we got kidnapped. I have SO thought this through, can you tell?
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