Guess what, you guys? Work is eating my soul right now. That is why my blog sucks. No, wait, that's not fair. My blog sucks because I am not giving it the attention it needs to flourish with sarcasm and obscenities. It's very sad, this blog neglect, but it happens far too often.
Yeah, I don't know what I'm talking about, either. Last night, we went to get some Mexican food for dinner and when I walked in, I noticed that they were having a special on Miller Lite and Bud Light. $1.95 drafts. I was all, "hell yeah!" and didn't bother to look at how many ounces it was. So I ordered it and almost passed out (from delight) when the waiter brought me this:
That is a shitload of beer for less than two dollars. I will have to remember that.
After dinner, we ran over to K-Mart, where we got distracted in the clearance toy aisle. OK. I'm going to show you something and you're not going to believe this is a child's toy BUT IT IS:
Yeah. I don't really know what the point of it is, but you put your mouth on that long, skinny, flesh-colored tube and when you blow, it makes the . . . body (?) of the toy get bigger. WHAT THE HELL, K-MART?
Then I almost bought some My Little Ponies. True story: