I have a rough draft of a story due tomorrow, so obviously I'm writing this instead. But, I'm probably writing the story about something that happened on Spring Break, so honestly, this is just brainstorming.

We left last Friday for Dayton airport, and we actually got there pretty early. Unfortunately, our flight had been cancelled because of weather in Chicago. Great. Fifty minutes later, we're in a taxi on our way to Cincinnati. Our new plan was to fly from Cincy to Boston at 11 PM, arrive in Boston at 1 AM, and fly from Boston to Miami (in first class!) at 6 AM. We waited around in Cincinnati for about 3 hours, and right before we got on our flight we found out we'd been bumped and that there were no flights to Miami until 9 AM the next day. This is the point we start freaking out, because we need to be in Miami by noon because we had to be on the boat by 3:30. So, Delta put us up in a Holiday Inn for the night and gave us each a 200 dollar ticket voucher. So if anyone wants to go on vacation sometime, let me know, because I already have my ticket.

The next morning (Saturday) we got to the airport at 5:30. In the MORNING. We sat around the airport for a few hours, and luckily our plane left on time, we got to Miami around noon, and we were on the boat by 2 PM. Thank god. As it turns out, though, the ship ended up leaving three hours later than it was supposed to because so many people's flights had been delayed by bad weather.

The boat, by the way, was awesome. We were on the Carnival Triumph (like the Insult Comic Dog). We dropped our luggage in our room, and went to the Lido deck for lunch. Food at lunch was free. Dinners were in a formal dining room. These were also free. Midnight buffets . . . every night . . . free. The best by far, however, was the 24 hour pizzaria. Also, of course, free.

We finally left the dock around 7, and Miami at night looked amazing. There was a full moon and it was reflecting on the water . . . wow.

Sunday was a day at sea, so we spent most of the day on the deck lying in the sun. Haha, sun on Sunday. Ok, never mind. We had our first dinner in the formal dining room on this night. Our waiter. Wow. His name was Nikola, from Croatia. He smelled SO good and he called us all "my lady." Which I think all guys should start doing, so take note. We sat at a table with other people. Three other girls, who we called Jersey Trash, because . . . well, they were trashy and we thought they were from Jersey. There were four guys, too, all named either Jorge or Juan. I don't know.

We spent Monday at Cozumel. In the morning and early afternoon we went to Passion Island, which is where they filmed the latest Corona commercials. It was beautiful. Blue water, soft sand, perfection. After that, we went back to the ship to lie on the deck for a while. Then, we had dinner and got ready to go back into Cozumel. We went to Senor Frogs in downtown Cozumel. We bought yard Margaritas, made from 158 proof Scorpion tequila. We had two of those and a couple of shots and . . . we were good. After that we took a taxi back to the pier and went to Fat Tuesdays. They had swings instead of benches that faced the water. Kate kept dropping her yard Margarita glass down close to the water, and so she would climb under the swings and down this little hill to get it.

Somehow we made it back onto the boat, got more drinks, and went to the 24 hour pizza place. At some point, I slipped and fell, and magically a glass disappeared over the side of the boat. Needless to say, we spent most of Tuesday in our room, trying to recover.

We were in Grand Cayman on Wednesday, and we went snorkeling with stingrays. I'd done it before, but it was still amazing. I took pictures, and if I can get a scanner and figure out how to put them online, I'll post them here.

We went to Jamaica on Thursday. We were on the Jamaican Queen Party Boat, which took us to climb Dunn's River falls (900 feet!), and then we cruised around Jamaica on the boat for a while. The water was really choppy so the boat was rocking a lot. Plus, they were serving liquid sunshine (lots of rum, a teeny bit of fruit juice) so it was definately a fun ride. We did a little shopping in Jamaica, and while were shopping we saw the weirdest duck I've ever seen.

Friday was our last day at sea (sad face), so we spent it in the sun, of course.

I forget what day most other stuff happened on, though. Here's some other random stuff:

The assistant cruise director was really short, stout and from Scotland, so people called him Wee Jimmy. We found out later his name was really Ralph Valente.

There was a 70 year old guy on board named Willy Banger.

Our waiter was hot. And smelled good. Oh, did I mention that already?

One of the movies they played during the week was From Justin to Kelly, which, if you're wondering, is not worth seeing. Trust me on this.

I tried to call people from all the ports, because I promised I'd try to call from faraway lands (heehee, it sounds like I'm talking about China or Pluto or something). My phone never worked, though. I got a signal in Cozumel, but when I tried to call people the Verizon lady came on and yelled at me in Spanish, so I got scared and hung up.

When we'd get back to our room after dinner, they'd have already turned down our beds. They'd also make animals out of our bath towels, and one night they made a swan. Which I thought was a cobra. Yeah.

That's all I can think of for now. This is quite possibly the longest entry ever.