Wednesday, January 05, 2005

would it be a mistake to send this resume?

Jennifer LastName
(address and phone number omitted for obvious reasons)

Objective: To find a job. Any job. As long as it doesn't involve flipping burgers or scrubbing toilets and is not (very) illegal.

Education: I can spell antidisestablishmentarianism AND I know what it means.

Languages: Four years of Spanish, but please don't ask me to speak or translate it.

Work Experience: Enough to know most people are douchebags.

Activities: Watching TV, posting stupid things to my blog, watching more TV.

References: I've never killed anyone (that I know of), I don't black out from drinking (anymore*), and I don't plan on needing maternity leave (barring the return of blackouts from drinking**)

*just kidding, Mom and Dad
**again, Mom and Dad, kidding

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