Thursday, September 30, 2004

Mr. President, what is your weapon of choice?

Well, debate numero uno is over, and now the news frenzy begins. Even though I knew the debate wasn't going to change my vote, I wanted to watch and form my own opinion before all the "experts" came on to tell me who did what better.

That said, did anyone else notice Bush's excessive blinking during his closing statement? I think he was trying to send the audience a message in Morse code.

My dad and I were trying to come up with ways to make the debate more interesting, so more people would watch. Here are a few things we came up with.

First of all, my dad suggested that whoever came in second should become VP. Think about it. They could have a whole new reality show based on their crazy Democan/Republicrat shenanigans.

My suggestion? Fight to the death. Then we wouldn't have to worry about another hanging-chad/Florida situation.

Or they could put on those Gladiator outfits (there's a pleasant image, eh?) and fight it out like they do on the show. They'd be teamed with people named Razor or Ice and do whatever it is they did on that American Gladiator show. I don't really remember. The only time I ever watched it was on Saturday mornings when I was waiting for Saved by the Bell to come on or something.

The moderator should get a whip to use whenever the candidates stray too far off topic.

Whoever makes a baby laugh first wins. I think Bush would win that one, because babies love monkeys.

The candidates are quizzed on a variety of pop culture categories.

Dunk tank.

Laura Bush and Teresa Heinz Kerry. Mud-wrestling.

I really wanted to see one of the candidates call the other "dillhole" or "butt monkey."

Juggling. With knives. Knives on fire.

Four words. Stupid Human Pet Tricks.

No comments:

Post a Comment