the five

Remember that Friends episode where Chandler introduces the "freebie" list? You know, the list of five celebrities you're allowed to sleep with without your significant other getting angry? On a sidenote, you would be surprised how many of my conversations begin with "Remember that Friends episode?" Or maybe you wouldn't. I watch a lot of TV, you know.

Ok, so it was a long drive back to Ohio from Chicago on Sunday. Seriously, it is supposed to take six hours and I'm fairly certain that we drove for at least 47 and a half. ALSO, I missed the first half of Grey's Anatomy and that is NOT COOL. Anyway, during the drive, my friend Heidi and I probably covered every topic of conversation known to man (and woman and dog and cat and fish and also duck), while her boyfriend spent the majority of the trip passed out in the back seat with his mouth hanging open, but my favorite conversation was our discussion of the freebie list.

At first, I couldn't think of anyone to add after Michael Vartan. But seriously, let's face it, Michael Vartan is so beautiful that merely the thought of him can blind you to all other men. Heidi's first choice was Kenny Chesney. Which I do not get. At all. I find it kind of fascinating that our lists were so different, although there were some overlaps. She brought up Matthew McConaughey, but the fact that he does not wear deodorant kind of skeeves me out. I threw in Dr. Luka from ER, but he was deemed "hot but not listworthy." She added Matthew Perry, which was appropriate. I thought a little Jason Bateman would be nice, but as she does not watch Arrested Development, she did not agree. Or know who I was talking about, I think. When I said Will Arnett, aka GOB, she looked at me like I was speaking a foreign language, but if he's good enough for Amy Poehler, he's good enough for me.

Throughout the trip, the car would be totally silent except for whatever song was on the radio, until one of us would shout, "Mark Ruffalo!" and the other one would go, "Oh, yeeeeeeeah, that's a good one," or "Jake Gyllenhaal!" which would lead us to Heath Ledger (mine) and Jamie Foxx (hers).

I think my final five ended up being Michael Vartan, Jake Gyllenhaal, George Clooney, John Krasinski, and Dr. McDreamy. Not Patrick Dempsey. Dr. McDreamy. However, I decided that I got more than five because I don't have a significant other. That is the rule. That I just made up. All celebrities are on the table. So to speak.

Watch out, Joaquin Phoenix.

Who would be on your list?*

*Yes, I am begging for comments . . . seriously, where are you people?**

**I miss you!