Showing one’s teeth is a submission signal in primates. When someone smiles at me, all I see is a chimpanzee begging for its life.

I was supposed to go to Alabama with some friends this weekend, but because of my bad CARma (haha, GET IT) and the expenses associated with it, I had to scratch those plans. Instead, I think my roommate and I are going to go to the Cincinnati Zoo on Saturday. While I cannot afford to travel to the far lands of the South, I think I can manage to swing the admission fee for the zoo, in case anyone else would like to passive aggressively comment about the state of my financial affairs. Oh wait, that was kind of passive aggressive of ME, wasn't it? Ah well. It's my blog and I'll bitch if I want to.

ANYWAY. I'm probably way more excited for the zoo than I should be but it's because I haven't been there in SO LONG. I should probably downplay my expectations just a little considering my hatred of people in large groups, especially in hot weather when the number of large women and hairy, hairy men in tiny tank tops is heightened exponentially. BUT I DON'T CARE. I can't wait to see these guys but I kind of hope Heidi wants to skip these guys. Oh my freaking lord, that picture scares the hell out of me. But these guys! And these guys! I might hyperventilate I'm so excited! Heidi should probably bring one of those little kid leashes so I don't run away and fall into the bear pit or something. But if I did, hopefully Baxter would save me and then I would take him to foggy London town because he is my little gentleman.

WOW, this entry sure took a fast trip to Crazytown, didn't it? I think I set a new record for myself.