- I came home for lunch today. I pulled into the parking lot, got out of the car, and used the automatic key fob thingie to lock the car doors. Then I tried to use the same automatic key fob thingie to unlock the door to the apartment. I hit the button several times before I realized that our front door is not automatic. YET.
- I accidentally bought unsalted pretzels at the grocery store, proving once again that I should not be trusted with something as important as the food shopping. DON'T WORRY, though. I am dipping them in mustard and they are still delicious.
- It is very, very hot today and is only going to get hotter and so I just called into work and told them I can't come back in because I'm sick. Also, my car won't start. Also, I have been kidnapped by pirates. Also, I was attacked by a wild goose and have to go to the hospital to get my pecking wounds fixed.
OK, that last one was a lie. Although, I did consider it, so it's a half-truth, right?
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