Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Being nice when you say something pricky is even prickier.*

You guys, today was almost complete and total shit. Aside from a short reprieve earlier this evening, today has been a total shit sandwich. Wait, that doesn't work because the good part of the day was in the middle. Ok, today was like a big, fat diamond rolled in shit bread. Or maybe not a diamond, because that would probably hurt if you tried to eat it. Anyway. Today was shitty. I don't want to talk about it.

I will talk about the big, fat diamond, though. Tonight was my first official night of volunteering. Maybe not official because I was technically "observing" but little kids don't just let you sit there and not do anything. I mean, they're at least going to use you as a prop. I was pretty excited because I got to go with the Littles, meaning kids 2nd grade and younger. I would prefer to work with the youngest kids because I feel, maturity wise, they are more on my level and will probably laugh if I say "poop" or "pee." ANYWAY. There were only three kids in the group tonight and instead of doing any of the planned activities, they wanted to play doctor and patient. I was quickly reminded that little kids have no boundaries when one of them, a little boy who was maybe 6, came directly to me and stuck a stethoscope down the front of my shirt so he could listen to my heart. I immediately thought, "oh god, I'm going to get kicked out when they walk in and see a little boy's hand down my shirt," but it was barely there for a minute when he exclaimed, "Hey! This thing actually works, I can hear your heart!" and ran away to give a stuffed bunny a shot.

Which, thank god . . . I hate shots. Tequila being the exception.

*Do you hear that, nice guys? Seriously, just be a prick. It's easier and it looks like more fun. Own it.

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