Hello, Internets. I hope you're doing well today. I'm great, thanks for asking! Kind of have a headache, though. But it's sunny outside! And somewhat warm! Birds and bees are having sex with each other, as is my understanding. Wow, I can't believe I'm stealing from The Simpsons now. LAME. Oh well.
Enough of that. So you guys know how I have to get a new car, right? Oh, well, I have to get a new car. Or a newish car. The odds of me being able to afford a NEW new car? Not good. Anyway, I would just be happy to have a reliable car. One where I don't have to check the oil every day. Or one that starts right away so I don't have to pray to little baby Jesus every time I turn the key in the ignition. Or one where the automatic locking mechanism is not duct-taped to the door. Or one that is not a HULKING DEATH TRAP OF DOOM.
Right now, I am just driving my car to work and back and hoping and praying that it lasts until next week. I don't know why I have made next week the deadline, but I have. Don't ask for logic, you won't find it here and if you don't know that by now, I'm just not sure what you're even doing on this blog. Please don't leave, though. I love you.
So, I've been doing a lot of car shopping on The Internets and I have come to the conclusion that cars are expensive and I am just going to invent a teleporter. OK, not really, because that sounds like a lot of work. I just need a car that has wheels. Any amount of doors. Ooh, ooh, I just remembered! Conversations! With My Roommate!
Heidi: So what kind of car do you want to get?
Me: I don't know. It just has to be an automatic.
Heidi: Yeah, that's what your mom said.
Me: What?
Heidi: When you and your dad were test driving your car, she was like, "I guess Jennie could technically drive a stick, but I worry. She's just so easily distracted."
Me: You know, I'd be offended, but she's right.
Heidi: Haha.
Me: Seriously, though, who would want to drive a stick?
Heidi: I don't know.
Me: I think guys like to drive a stick because it's like an extension of their penis.
Heidi: Okaaaaay.
Yeah. So that happened. I also thought about leasing a car, but this one website had a quiz on whether you should buy or lease and one of the questions was "Do you get emotionally attached to your car?" and at first I was all, "Who gets emotionally attached to A CAR?!" and then I remembered that I named my car "Tealy" and gave it a hug on Sunday when it wouldn't start and if that isn't emotionally attached, I don't know what is.
No comments:
Post a Comment