Wednesday, November 17, 2004

fly away

I was in Meijer the other day. Do they have those everywhere or just in Ohio? Basically it's like Wal-Mart, Kroger, and Target all rolled into one. It has everything. You could do your grocery shopping, buy a new TV, cash your paycheck, sell your children, complete your Christmas shopping, and get your pictures developed all in one place. Recently, the Meijer in my neighborhood has done a lot of renovation. The store used to look really warehouse-y, kind of like Sam's Club or Big Bear. Well, now it looks more like Target pretty much everywhere but the grocery section.

Meijer will never be Target, though, and you know why? Because there are always birds flying around Meijer. Always. I was standing in the pet section, looking at those dorky figurines you can put in fish bowls (shut up) and when I looked up I saw two birds (sparrows or something, I'm not a freaking ornithologist) sitting up in the rafters. You never see that at Target. I have no idea how the birds get into Meijer, but every time I go in there (which is not very often because I hate Meijer with the fire of a thousand suns) they're there.

This was about the time I started laughing hysterically, scaring the little old lady down the aisle, because I was picturing someone getting home with their new desk or sweater or crate of oranges and finding bird poop all over it.

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