Wednesday, April 23, 2008

I only have one goal today. To make one kid like me. Just one.

The other day, my boss sent an email about Take Your Child to Work Day, which is tomorrow. Basically she told everyone in the building that they could bring their kids to the HR department and we would give them some treats.

"Oh no!" I shouted from my office (professional). "Does this mean there are gonna be kids all over the place on Thursday?"

Then, BOOM, my boss was at my doorway. I was all, "oh, actually I really like kids," and I wasn't even lying. Kids as a giant, faceless group, I am scared of, but kids on individual level are cool. Not babies, though. Like the real little ones? The ones that don't do anything but lie there and poop? Useless. And sometimes even old babies (you know, like two-year-olds) are annoying. Or they throw up in a restaurant while you're trying to enjoy your dinner. Anyway, where was I?

"I like kids, too," my boss said. "As long as they don't talk to me. Or touch me. Or spill anything." Ha! Awesome. And then, you guys, she told me that since I like kids so much, I "get" to be the one to pass out the treats tomorrow. I was like, "thanks?" Although, I wonder if this is an all day assignment because passing out treats to kids sounds way more exciting than what I normally do.

Also, we're having an ice cream social today at work. I don't know why and I'm not going to ask. You don't question free ice cream.

11 comments:

  1. I don't really like kids either... but I love my own. ;)

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  2. Kids as a giant, faceless group, I am scared of, but kids on individual level are cool. Not babies, though. Like the real little ones? The ones that don't do anything but lie there and poop? Useless.

    This is pretty much exactly how I feel about kids! Also college students. I hate college students as a giant faceless group but I like them on an individual level, which is good because that's what I DO for a living.

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  3. bryna, I'm beginning to think that's how it works.

    Srah, I have no ill feelings toward college students, but then again, I don't have to deal with them every day.

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  4. I seriously had to LOL at this.. read my blog :)

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  5. haha, you'll enjoy my blog post today then! well, maybe not "enjoy". well... you'll see!

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  6. How was the ice cream?!

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  7. I like to hold babies and then they do that shrieking thing where they want something but they can't tell you because they can't talk (WTF) and then they get returned to their rightful owner(s).

    So you'd be correct. They're pretty useless. Now a three year old? They're fun and they know how to retrieve the remote.

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  8. Yes, kids that can fetch are the best.

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  9. My mother always told me that the only reason on this Earth to reproduce was to have your very own personal slaves. People don't question it, cuz you can just call it "Chores" and suddenly it builds character. I know that's why WE decided to have kids.
    great post, saw it on Fivestarfriday.com

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  10. So far, that's the only reason I can see for having kids.

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