I'm going to a sleepover tonight. That's right, I said a sleepover. My friend Nancy (you know Nancy . . . Nancy of Dinosaur World! Nancy of the Penis Cake! OK, that's enough) got married in the Caribbean last month and she's FINALLY back and done with crazy stuff (until, you know, her reception in May . . . where there will be a hot dog bar . . . don't be jealous) and since her HUSBAND (yikes) is out of town tonight, she's invited us over for wine and Wii and, I'm assuming, boy talk and pillow fights and prank phone calls. That? Was the longest sentence ever.
She also has about a billion pictures for us to look at, including pictures from the bachelorette party that almost got snowed out (snowed in?) and, I'm just guessing here, but I think there may be some incriminating pictures I need to steal and burn so no one ever sees them. Apparently she and her HUSBAND (yikes) got a new grill (what is with you married people and your weirdo, grown-up purchases?) and so we're all going to attempt to grill hot dogs and hamburgers without burning their house down. The back up plan is pizza. I think it's good that we have a back up plan, seeing as how Heidi once set herself on fire with a marshmallow.
Last night, I went running because . . . well, I'm trying this new thing where I don't sit around reading and surfing the Internets 24 hours a day. It's . . . different. Anyway, the geese, they are everywhere and they are so mean! I was walking down the path by the pond and this lady goose (I guess?) was sitting right in the middle of the path. And this mean boy goose (I guess?) was like . . . I don't know, guarding her or something and I just tried to walk by them and he started hissing at me. I think he was hissing anyway. I had my music up pretty loud so I couldn't really hear him, but he had his mouth open and was flapping his wings at me and you guys? I'm not going to lie to you. I thought I might die.
Also, a little show called The Office came back to television last night, and the world made sense again. Heh.
Heh heh heh. Wii knee
ReplyDeleteYeah, I definitely stole that from somewhere, but I can't remember where. Oops. Hee.
ReplyDeleteI love geese. They're really cool, and BIG! Don't get me wrong—it's not like I want to have sex with them. But don't you think they're impressive with that whole flying thing they do? Bye now.
ReplyDeletei love how you're all self-referential like TWoP. you should totally write for them.
ReplyDeletePeefer, I'm really happy to hear that you do not, in fact, want to have sex with geese.
ReplyDeletekat! do you think they'd hire me now that they're owned by Bravo?
i think they'll hire you BECAUSE they're owned by bravo.
ReplyDelete(i don't know what that means)
ReplyDeleteI think it means I get to work for TWoP, so yay!
ReplyDeleteFor some reason I read your post and thought you needed this link to brighten your day (and to dispense some goose-justice).
ReplyDeleteMaybe it only makes sense if you're a loyal fail dogs viewer, but still...
'mouse, alas . . . my company blocks whatever that link is. Le sigh.
ReplyDeleteDwight crashing the dinner party with his old babysitter was the highlight of my week.
ReplyDelete