Friday, December 03, 2004

chickens fascinate me

I really have nothing to say. I just felt like posting. Right now I'm watching a rerun of SNL. Earlier they did the "Oops, I crapped my pants" fake commercial. That's one of my favorites. Old people wearing diapers under their tennis clothes . . . priceless. Now they're doing the Schweaty Balls sketch. I don't really like Alec Baldwin, except on SNL. He's very hairy. I love the sketch he's in with Adam Sandler, where Adam Sandler plays Canteen Boy. All of the sentences in the paragraph are very short. I don't know why. They just are. It's like I'm five. But I'm not. Except maybe maturity-wise.

Does anyone else miss when Comedy Central owned all the SNL reruns? Now they're on E!, which, I guess is fine, but Comedy Central used to play SNL at least 3 times a day and sometimes it would be on ALL DAY LONG. Now Comedy Central is stuck with Mad TV, which just isn't as good as SNL. The only thing I like on Mad TV is Stuart. You know, the six-year-old who takes off his pants and eats candy that he finds on the ground and says things like, "Lemme do it!" and "I don't wanna say!" Junior year, when I lived in the sorority house, we were all crazy obsessed with Stuart. We downloaded a bunch of the sketches on Morpheus or Limewire or whatever software we were using to download music and videos illegally that year. My favorite illegal software was Audiogalaxy. It was better than Napster, although not as much fun to say.

ANYWAY. I'm not kidding you, we would watch these sketches every day. They were all about 5 - 10 minutes long, and we'd designate at least 20 minutes and we'd crowd around someone's computer and watch this tiny little video file and laugh and laugh and be happy and full of joy. So sad.

The worst part was, we tended to quote Stuart A LOT when we were drunk. Sometimes, to the horror of more normal people around us (which was everyone), we'd have entire conversations with each other in the Stuart voice. For those of you who have never had the privilege of hearing the Stuart voice, it's very high-pitched and whispery. And really, if you haven't heard the Stuart voice then that means you DON'T KNOW who Stuart from Mad TV is, that just makes my heart sad and MAKES ME HIT CAPS LOCK AND TYPE LIKE THIS.

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