Tuesday, December 14, 2004

search results that have me puzzled

"beer pong tables" and "design of": Look, people. This isn't rocket science. You get a big table or, if that's too expensive, a piece of plywood to put ON a table, possibly paint it, and set ten cups up on each side like you would bowling pins. Just add ping pong balls.

meningitis beer pong: Ok. Beer pong is NOT the most sanitary game ever invented. Sometimes, like if you're playing it at a college bar where people have been known to puke on the floor, it can be downright disgusting. You're throwing ping pong balls at cups of beer, invariably the ping pong balls will land on the floor, and THERE IS NO WAY that rinsing them off in little cups of water between throws is going to sanitize them at all. That being said, I've never heard of anyone getting meningitis from playing beer pong. I've never heard of anyone getting ANYTHING from playing beer pong, other than, well, really drunk.

how to brown meat: You are obviously in the wrong place. Here's why.

what did they use before shampoo?: Um. I don't know. Rocks?

paul rudd anti bush: Dude, EVERYTHING here is anti-Bush, even Paul Rudd.

ho: Bite me, asshole.

if I die in a combat zone spark notes: Just READ it! You don't need to cheat! It's a good story, I swear. Tim O'Brien is awesome. Trust me! I've read most of what he's written. I wrote my thesis on him. I know things.

a sad story about jennie: Ok. Once upon a time, a girl named Jennie had nothing better to do than post an entry on her blog about people who had ended up there by searching for odd things. She was obviously creatively tapped. Then she found five dollars. Then she lost it. THE END.

marathon commando runner underwear: I'm gonna leave this one alone.

2004 christmas at val kilmers: Hey. Buddy. I'm sorry. You weren't invited. It wasn't my decision. Val is still mad at you. You know why. Don't try to explain. Maybe next year, OK?

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