I couldn't sleep, so obviously I sign online and start surfing the internet for random shit. And random shit I did find. Here are a couple news articles. They are all real. I kid you not.
St. Paul woman bites off man's tongue during kiss. According to her, it was an accident. I'll buy that. Except I totally don't.
Man Charged With Tossing Snake Into Bar. He's been charged with assault with a deadly weapon. They interviewed the guy that volunteered to take the snake home, and I quote, "He's actually nice, for a rattler," he said. "I just fed him a hamster, and I'm going to call him Jack."
There are a couple things about that statement that make me wonder. But I really, truly hope that this guy didn't feed the snake his kid's hamster. Cause I'm thinking the kid is gonna notice that Hammy is missing and Daddy got a new pet and even the stupidest child will eventually put two and two together.
This Lady is from Indiana. So, all you Hoosiers better watch out.
Wow. I'm just . . . speechless.
Can you say "bitches" in a news article?