it doesn't look like much when you put it all together

I've been meaning to post this for a while now (um, like say at the end of last year?) but I kept forgetting. Meaning I'd remember and then think, "I'll do it later," knowing FULL WELL I would NOT do it later because later I'd be watching old Tivo'ed episodes of America's Next Top Model. Anyway, I don't know why in God's name you'd WANT to read all of this but if for some reason you're really bored and you've finished the rest of the Internet, I hereby present . . . My 2006 Wrap-Up. Yeah, I think it needs a better title, too.

Things I did this year:

built a fort in my living room
got in a shredder standoff
reminded myself that I'm not in college anymore
got freaked the hell out thanks to my mom
watched football
went bra shopping
made family members cry
got hit on at work
wrote a lot about nothing
went to Chicago
went a little crazy with the P&P obsession
moved
gained a roommate
vowed to change my hairstyle
turned 24
told a boy I liked him and got shot down
went to Chicago again and walked in on people having sex
fell into a men's room
did not get dooced
became a finalist in a writing contest
and then lost
went to the zoo
snuck into a pool
got pulled over (but no ticket, whoo!)
squashed lesbian rumors
posted a fake ad on Craigslist
realized Heidi and I are not very good cooks
went to a Reds game
judged a small child
posted a real ad on Craigslist
got free tickets (thanks again, Uncle John! also, Aunt Beth, thank you for not wanting to go to the concert so I could go instead!)
saw a horrifying image in a Walmart parking lot
met some (fake?) pimps
had a lot of conversations with my roommate
seriously
a lot
went to Oktoberfest and generally made of my ass of myself ALL. DAY. LONG.
read a lot
dressed up in a (lame) costume to celebrate Halloween; said costume apparently altered my personality for one night only
voted
went to the doctor
babysat
had a weak moment
pretended to be someone else
met a random person from the internet, arranged by a different random person from the internet (thanks, kat)
finished Christmas shopping early, proving that hell has frozen over
was a Grinch
got a new bed

Things I did not do this year:

get arrested
get eaten by coyotes
get pregnant
get married
swear off alcohol
spill all of my secrets on this blog (score!)

So, I'd say this year was a winner.